Today’s post is a poem I wrote a couple of weeks ago that I wanted to do as a video; but I decided against it because.. well I just wasn’t comfortable with it as I thought I was. Nevertheless, I still think it summarizes almost everything that this site is about and who I am.
You’re Not Finished
I’m a lot of formers, there’s a lot I used to be
Let me tell you about transformation, how God saved a wretched me.
There wasn’t day where I wouldn’t look at a man with lustful eyes,
His body my desire yet also my demise.
With marijuana I saw life in different colors & shades,
but ironically even the power of weed would fade.
My biggest struggle, alcohol. No one could stop me from drinking..
But even in my drunken stupor I knew my life was sinking.
Soon bartenders couldn’t create a strong concoction,
& I was ready to end my life twice but God said, “No, not an option.”
A life riddled with abuse, addictions, setbacks, and suicide…
I think it’s safe to say my path needed a guide.
Now I gotta be honest, let me tell the truth, world…
There are things I still struggle with but they don’t define this girl.
All that tragedy I can count as joy to help people like me,
& I can use my life as proof to show how good it can be.
I’ve only discovered this recently and a put it on paper for all to see
The death of my old self, the birth of a new me.
I want to tell you you’re valuable survivors, you have significance and purpose
Never believe anyone who treats you like you’re worthless.
It may seem like the chances of people accepting you are slim,
But their rejection is not a reflection of you, it’s a reflection of them.
You will feel the acceptance I do, a joy no one can diminish.
Your past isn’t all there is to you there’s your future; you’re not finished.
So yea… I hope this affects someone and leads them to think of themselves differently. I’m not saying it all gets better overnight; especially if you struggle with depression, anxiety, and other mental illness just like I do. In fact, I sometimes have a depressive episode once every month or two. But we all have the strength inside of us to overcome all odds, and we have the ability to get help when we need it. Your future can be bright and your purpose is promising!
Stay strong, survivors.