I’m not sure people realize how powerful rejection is.
To make this short I want to outline what can happen to most people when they are rejected, whether they are aware of it or not.
1) Best case scenario, they know that not everyone will like them and they move on, knowing they are loved for who they are not in spite of it.
2) That person may or may not try to be who they are around someone else… to see if they like it. Going from person to person, group to group trying to fit in somewhere.
3) If constant rejection occurs they develop a defense mechanism.
4) If that defense mechanism is exposed, they will either reject the person who exposed it, revamp the defense mechanism, or develop supporting defense mechanism.
5) Worst case scenario, they believe they will always be rejected and they isolate, harm themselves, self-destruct, or kill themselves.
In most of those cases, rejection tends to recreate the person as a whole into someone they were never meant to be. They can mold into what everyone else wants them to be so they always fit in, but they lose themselves because they have learned to hate themselves.
Bullies, people in positions of authority, and opportunists capitalize on this… people who are rejected grow to believe and accept that this is the way life is supposed to be. Identity is lost, and people fall into one of two categories: to kill or be killed.
This cycle continues.. until love happens. Love that is proactive. Love that gives time and attention. Love that requires doing so with our whole hearts and minds. It never fails. EVERY SINGLE TIME I see someone being loved with all of the above its like I can actually visualize someone’s mindset shifting. Their posture becomes upright. They are filled with hope and confidence. They want change. They start to believe the best for themselves.
It can range from the retired man who brings people free coffee everyday and has done so for 7 years, the girl who doesn’t have a place to call home herself but makes time to visit and pour into people in their homes, the woman who patiently encourages her sister out of a negative mindset almost daily, the man who has a father’s heart for the younger men and spends time motivating and being an example for them. It can be you… it can be me.
Its time for us to love one another and shift the atmosphere, survivors. This community can only be strong if we accept each other, not reject each other.